Aaron Williamson's webl

I was on the treadmill when this segment on CNN about conservatives’ opposition to Obama’s health care policies made me wheeze uncomfortably with laughter.  A swiftboat organization called Conservatives for Patients’ Rights–led by disgraced, corrupt healthcare CEO Richard Scott–has paid $20 million for a piece of the media spotlight on the issue.  The campaign demonstrates everything that is wrong with 21st-century conservative politics, the casting of corporate-interest lobbying as grassroots campaigning being first among the problems.

But what got me laughing was Scott’s pithy demonstration of another problem: conservatives’ refusal to acknowledge the complexity of political issues or the merits of opposing arguments.  No doubt on the advice of his swiftboat-PR consultants, Scott blithely dropped this line during his CNN spot:

Are the decisions that I make with my doctor for my care going to be dictated by some federal bureaucracy? That’s very scary.

I won’t bother connecting the dots.  Suffice it to say that I think it’s disingenuous for conservatives to rally under this particular banner.

I found this ad for 100% authentic Amish heat-turbine powered mantles in today’s NY Metro.  Notice the loving way the Amish man takes his plane to an already-finished fireplace while a fire burns inside.  Notice the natural drop-shadow which was definitely not photoshopped in because the Amish do not use computers.

I know high-tech heat turbines don’t seem like the Amish way either, but they actually operate entirely on the wrath of the Almighty rather than AC.

The HP multifunction printer at my office consistently wakes up (from sleep mode) on the wrong side of the bed,¹ displaying this self-deprecating message:

1. “Consistently” here modifying the entire clause “wakes… bed” rather than “wakes.”  In fact, the P.O.S. rarely functions properly and suspend issues are only a subcategory in its hefty catalog of flaws. [↩]